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A Letter To My Single (Guy) Friends

Hey, dude.

I’m not sure if I’ve told you this lately, but thank you. In a world that is obsessed with sex, lust and “send nudes,” you’re living your life to a higher standard. When other guys are looking for hook-ups and opportunities for a night of Netflix and chill, you’re not. I can’t imagine the type of daily struggle you go through maintaining your purity, especially when the world defines “being a man” by how many women you can sleep with. A woman is not a notch in your belt, but someone to be treasured and respected.

You’re not only committed to guarding your own purity, but also the purity of the women you date and the girls who have the honor of being your friend. You care about our hearts, not just what’s under our yoga pants. I never have to worry about any ogling, or a wandering eye that lingers too long on my top or bottom.

I don’t know how difficult it is to divert your eyes from the temptation of pornography when your flesh is crying out “just click it!” But you make the conscious choice not to look, and for that I’m thankful.

It’s not that you don’t notice beauty, because you do. You notice the beauty of my heart of worship, or the way I serve without complaining. Thanks for noticing that one, because your affirmation, “Great job!” encouraged me to keep going even when the job was getting tiresome. Speaking of which, you’re great at cheering us all on when we need it. You offer godly wisdom and a listening ear. After all that, you pray … and you keep praying faithfully until an answer comes.

I see the way you use this season of singleness as an opportunity to serve and to give of your time and skills. You’re not lazy, that’s for sure. You’ve got integrity, and when you say you’re going to do something, you do it. If someone needs a helping hand moving or doing some odd job, you’re more than welcome to lend a hand. It’s just who you are; you don’t think twice about it. 

You aren’t concerned about purchasing a new video game or spending your nights getting wasted with your buddies. Instead, you use your money to bless someone in need or to pay for pizza for the gang while we’re hanging out. Speaking of which, you know how to have fun. You’re constantly laughing and enjoy being with your friends, even if it’s just for a Saturday night spent playing board games.

For all of this and more, thank you. I appreciate you, man of God!

Before I go, I also want to apologize for the way we (women) have spoken about you at times. I’m not proud of it, but I haven’t always given you the benefit of the doubt. I’ve thought the worst of you because of how other men have acted, but it’s clear you are not like them. I do see Jesus in you. I see His love flowing through you. You’re His and you’re not just like all the rest.

Keep up the good work. You’re running this race well!

About Holly Hrywnak

Holly is a 30ish-year-old writer who strives to share honestly and transparently in hopes that it will encourage others to be open about their own struggles and lessons learned. She's been accused of being sassy, which she finds to be an admirable attribute. Her favorite things include: making people laugh, chocolate, sweatshirt weather and authentic conversations over coffee. One day she hopes to find herself a bearded lumberjack to call her own.
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