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Single Matters

Single Matters is thrilled to share posts from guest writers. You’ll find the bio of the writer inside the article.

5 Ways To Keep From Withering In Waiting

“Will I get married, Siri?” I was in my mid-30s, still waiting for my man to materialize. College and grad school? Check. God, apparently, was in no hurry to marry me off, so more check marks followed: finishing postdoc; getting licensed; starting my practice. Meanwhile, grad school friends had taken the same amount of time not just to get their …

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God, If He’s Not For Me, Don’t Let Him Contact Me

God, if this is not what You have for me, then don’t even let him contact me. I stared at the words I’d just written in my prayer journal, and wondered if I really meant them. I knew my tendency to pray what I should pray, even if my sincerity was questionable.  A friend had approached me about setting me up with a …

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When You’re Tired Of Being The Strong Single Mom

Being a single mom is often associated with images of a super mom wearing a super hero cape, or words that describe someone who is tough and independent. While I can mostly agree with those things, I also know that as a single mom myself, I have had my fair share of moments that I refer to as “weak.” Recently, …

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Qualities You Must Have On Your Future Spouse List

I had been praying for two years for God to bring a godly man into my life. I prayed daily and even “helped God out” by making a list of all the godly qualities said man should have. Maybe you’ve done this too: He should love the Lord. He must be passionate about his work. He should have the patience …

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What Does It Look Like To Wait For A Mate?

My heart was in agony. I couldn’t handle the unknown any longer. I needed rest. So I asked God a simple question: “Yes or no?” I was actually in a healing and encouraging season of life, after being in ‘deep valley’ and ‘refining fire’ seasons. At that point, I had been single again for 7 years. My first husband left …

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I Never Thought I’d Get Divorced

Divorced. Single again. Now what? Being in a broken and abusive marriage was hard. Coming out of it was even harder. I was lonely, sad, depressed, angry and hurt. My dreams had been crushed. The life I thought I was going to have no longer was. I had to move back in with my parents and carried a huge amount …

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5 Tips To Grow In Confidence And Achieve Your Dreams!

I’m confident.  Or at least I thought I was … I’ve always prided myself as a confident person. But lately I’ve begun to question my long-held belief. The questioning began the day I picked up a pencil to write and found myself in a deep inner dialogue. It went something like this… Hello, pencil! My trusted friend.  Why do you …

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Why Hanging Out Is Really Dating

We have created this fantasy regarding dating, especially in Christian circles, that you wait for God and sooner or later you get “the one.” If you do it right, there’s no muss and no fuss. Well, that certainly hasn’t been my experience. As Christians we boycotted “dating” and created all of these other pseudo-dating practices to facilitate the fantasy. We …

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When Controlling Your Life Hurts Your Future

I’ve lived a life built on “What If’s.” And living a “What If” life was slowly killing me. What if I never make more than I do right now? What if I do… What if I never fulfill my life purpose? What if I exceed my every expectation… What if I never find community? What if I develop rich community… Anxiety, …

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When You Feel Like You Don’t Belong

I still remember the day these words were spoken to me at a prophetic training event at church. “I just felt like the Lord says sometimes you feel downcast about yourself. I saw you with a crown on your head.  And He just wanted you to know … He wants you to see you how He sees you. He says …

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