Still single at 40. I never thought those words would apply to me, and I was crushed that they did. For me, prolonged singleness was a loss — loss of love, partnership, motherhood and the joys they were supposed to bring. The year I turned 40, I wrote the final version of Not Meant to Be: Trusting God for the …
Read More »Joanne Chantelau Hofmeister
The Blessings Of Thanksgiving
It was Thanksgiving Day, 2009. I sat at the overflowing dinner table with my family: parents, sisters and their spouses, young nephews, and 1-year-old niece. Before digging into turkey and mashed potatoes, we sang the Doxology together: Praise God from whom all blessings flow …. Singing at the table was not a tradition for us. That year, it was a special …
Read More »Comfort For Those Grieving Alone
My mother’s hands were cold and still. She lay with her eyes closed, her only movement coming from the effort of breathing. I had been by her side all night, listening to the rhythm of her breath, shaking with the shock that my mother was truly dying from the cancer we prayed God would heal. Around 5:15 a.m., her breathing …
Read More »What I Learned From Online Dating
It was my younger sister’s 39th birthday, and she texted me with the news: She got engaged. That meant I was the lone spinster of four sisters, 40 years old with no potential marriage partners in sight — and no potential dates in sight, either. I’d never had a lot of experience with dating. My first date turned out to …
Read More »From Single To Married: When Friendships Change
One of your girlfriends gets engaged. You’re happy for her, but you know what’s coming: She’s going to disappear after the wedding. Or so it seems. I remember the change in relationship with a good friend who married years ago. We got together less frequently, and I never spent time with them as a couple. Eventually, our times together became …
Read More »Single And Disappointed
That day, the sting of still-single-at-forty was too fresh. Although I was excited about the Christian writers’ conference I was attending, and I carried around a proposal for my book on prolonged singleness, I could not ignore the disappointment that had dominated my heart since that recent landmark birthday. When it was my turn to introduce myself to the group, …
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