If you’re single and reading this, I have a question for you: How do you feel about this coming Valentine’s Day? How do you be single on Valentines Day?
I ask because I’ve often found that many of us fall into one of two categories. Either we adopt the spirit that this will “not be another Valentine’s Day” that we spend alone and depressed. Or we dread waking up on the actual day thinking “Ugh…not another Valentine’s Day!” If there’s another category you feel you fit in, I’d love to hear about it.
Well, wherever you are, if you’re still single without a date or committed relationship on Valentine’s Day, I want you to resolve that you won’t be alone and depressed this Valentine’s Day. So I’d like to share with you my own do’s and don’ts of Valentine’s Day for singles. You can practice them up to and throughout the day. And if it inspires you to come up with some of your own, that’s even better.
Put God first. God, and not a relationship or even a marriage, is our reason for existence. Yes, marriage is good. God created it. I believe He wants us to have it. But I also believe He doesn’t want us to desire it to the point that we become paralyzed with sadness because we don’t have it. Seek God above all else so He can allow everything else to follow.
Be grateful for what you DO have. It’s true that someone is always worse off than you. The very things you take for granted are things people all over the world have to live without. I found this out when I volunteered in an orphanage in a third-world country. Since that experience, I’m better able to check myself when I complain about what I don’t have.
Confide in someone about your sadness. Your faith isn’t weak if you can’t shake your sadness. It might mean that you need help moving past it. Talk to a skilled counselor or trusted pastor or chaplain.
Spend the day alone. Meet up with other single friends and do something unique that will help you celebrate the holiday. And dream together about finding love God’s way! If you’re new to an area or haven’t quite made a strong enough connection with other singles, ask your church or a local church if they have or can host a gathering for other singles in the community.
Spend the day bashing happy couples. I believe in my heart of hearts that God does not like jealousy. Why? Because it tells Him you believe what He’s given you isn’t good enough. Don’t fall into the trap of bashing happy couples who celebrate the holiday together (as they should), especially if they’re taking the time to honor God during their celebration.
Valentine’s Day is just one day of the year. Thank God for the day and thank Him in advance for whatever He might have in store for you. But above all, remember that “single” is a season and that God can do anything!