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ABCs For Single Parenting: Part 13


The ABCs (Absolute Basic Criteria) for Raising Spiritually Sensitive Children – Part 13

The Bible provides sufficient principles for child rearing, but it does not give us a detailed blueprint for every action. Let’s keep in mind that God’s Word speaks clearly of the righteous goal for parenting: “Be ye holy for I am holy” — (1 Peter 1:16).

It is my desire to show you the practical side of biblical truth. There is no greater joy than to see your children grown, serving the Lord and raising your grandchildren with the same biblical goal of holiness.


Y is for Yes

You don’t have to teach your children to say NO, but you will have to teach them to say YES!

When my granddaughter was about 14 months old she was saying “no” quite often and my daughter began intentionally working with her to say “yes.” She wasn’t getting the hang of it, so Brooke tried another route, “Isabella, say OK.” Yay, it worked, and soon Isabella added something positive to her quickly increasing vocabulary. Her mommy taught her to replace “no” with “OK.” Now she is almost 2, and “yes” is pronounced beautifully. In fact, she is now speaking in sentences and she can say “OK, yes, or sometimes yes, ok.”

The power of positive thinking and a “yes” attitude helps to cope more easily with the daily affairs of life. It brings optimism into your life , and makes it easier to avoid worry and negative thinking. For Isabella this means instead of saying to her 3-year-old big sister Sophia, “No, mine,” she can be taught to change that way of thinking and say, “Yes, ok.” Her attitude can be adjusted to enjoy saying yes. I will share with my sister, because I am so glad that I have a sister to play with and I would love to give her a turn with my baby doll.

We aren’t only teaching our children to share and play fair, more importantly we are teaching them to be grateful for every situation and to say yes and to choose happiness in all circumstances.

A “yes” attitude, or a positive attitude manifests in the following ways:

Positive thinking.

Constructive thinking.

Creative thinking.

Looking at failure and problems as blessings in disguise.

Being inspired.

Choosing happiness.

Displaying self-esteem and confidence.

Looking for solutions.

Seeing opportunities.

Making you smile.

A positive attitude leads to happiness and success and can change your whole life. If you look at the bright side of life, your life becomes filled with light. This light affects not only you and your kids, but the way you look at the world. A “yes” attitude is contagious.

My mom-to-mom advice to you this month is, “Don’t worry, be happy.”

Don’t focus on the “no’s.” Find a way to turn the focus to the “yes.” Choose to be happy! Be optimistic and smile.

Z is for Zeal

From A to Z it’s easy to see that to be a great mom raising great kids, you have to want to. Seriously want to, as in eagerly desire. It takes ZEAL!

Webster definition: Zeal, eager desire and enthusiastic diligence.

I love seeing expectant moms with that cute baby bump. They are so excited to decorate the nursery and buy baby clothes and gadgets all in preparation for the big day. The baby shower is overflowing with fun, cute decorations, games, friends and family all topped off with a delicious and beautiful cake.

That’s great, pregnant mom, don’t ever let the excitement of being a mom fade. Keep that zeal! That “enthusiastic diligence” should be tucked away in your back pocket. You are going to need it to keep from becoming a zombie after the baby is born and for the next two years when you are functioning on very little sleep.

A zealous mom has an eager desire and an enthusiastic diligence to raise great kids. Kids who are spiritual champions!

In George Barna’s book Revolutionary Parenting, he defines Spiritual Champion: an irrepressible follower of Jesus Christ who accepts the Bible as truth, lives by its principles, and seeks ways to impact the world and continually deepen his or her relationship with God.

That’s the goal. That’s how we finish strong as “revolutionary moms.” We must have the zeal to raise spiritual champions. It will take determination, perseverance, inclination, enterprise, initiative and diligence … one day at a time.

A to Z beginning to end, no matter where you hang your hat, it might be in Zimbabwe, Zion or any Zip code in between, it’s a fact that your little Zygote is growing up. I have been zooming through my life as a mother for 27 years, and now my youngest of our four children has just turned 18 and will be graduating from high school in a few short weeks, which will no doubt zoom by like the past 27 years have. I have passed on my zeal to him and he is a spiritual champion who also has a zeal for the Lord and a zest for life.

Now that you know you’ll need some zeal to be a great mom raising great kids, where do you get it? It’s not like you can add it to your Babies R Us registry. The trick of the trade is found in Romans 12:10-12: “Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”

For some reason I am in the mood to go to the zoo and visit the zebra’s. Let’s go!


Read more of these great tips from the series.

Trina Titus Lozano, mother of four grown children and grandmother of nine, is a former professor of home economics at Christ For the Nations Institute in Dallas, Texas, and the creator of The Home Experience Semester Course. The daughter of Devi and Larry Titus, Trina is the author of Wait, the Smart Choice Abstinence Education for Public Schools, and the vice president of Wonderful Days, a nonprofit organization based in Fort Worth, Texas. Trina is a counselor, cognitive therapist and popular inspirational speaker at public schools nationwide. She has been recognized by the state of Texas premarital counseling program, Twogether in TEXAS. Trina is the author of The ABC’s, Absolute Basic Criteria for Raising the Next Christian Generation, and is an ordained Christian minister. She is open and candid, and her messages apply to real-life issues. Trina and her husband, James (since 1983), reside in Colleyville, Texas.

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