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Why I’m Choosing To Be Submissive To My Husband

Photo courtesy of Send me adrift via Flickr
Photo courtesy of Send me adrift via Flickr

According to, the definition of submission is to give over or yield to the power or authority of another.

Don’t freak out yet. Stay with me here. The word authority used to make me cringe. Add the word submission to that, and my stomach turned. Honestly, sometimes it still does. Why?

Authority could not be trusted, especially the authority of a man. 

I lived with this belief most of my life. It’s only been over the last few years that God has done a powerful work in my heart. A couple years ago we went through the book of Colossians at church. The gasps in the crowd were loud when the words “Wives, submit to your husbands” filled the air. A few years ago I would have been one of those gasping. I would have rolled my eyes and blew it off with an “It ain’t happening!”

I like to be in control. After being sexually abused as a little girl, I decided I had to be in control. To me, it was the only way I could stay safe. I walked through life with that philosophy.

If you’re not in control, you will get hurt. 

Guess what? That’s not biblical.

I desire to be submissive to my husband. I’m excited to submit to his leadership. I’m ready because I’m realizing God’s got my back. I will choose to be submissive to my husband because:

God is going to put a man in my life who loves the Lord with all his heart, strength, mind and soul. If my husband is following that command, then everything else is going to be put in place. Why wouldn’t I want to submit to his leadership? He’s following the leadership of God.

Submitting to my husband is submitting to God first. God won’t call me into a marriage that doesn’t put Him first. He promises to take care of me, and I’m standing on that promise. A picture of God taking care of me is Him putting a man in my life who wants to do the same.

Following the leadership of my husband is serving. It’s not only serving God; it’s serving others. It’s a ministry to other women struggling with the same issues as myself. If I can do God’s will and follow my husband, won’t others want to do the same?

God is showing me that not every man wants to hurt me. This is hard for me to admit, because my fear of men is still very real. He’s teaching me, though, that I must do it afraid. He will guide me if I just keep following Him. I’m standing on that promise.

I know it’s not going to be easy. Rebellion is still in me. The need to be in control is still in me. The need to be independent and do things myself is still in me. But if they weren’t, I wouldn’t need God.

If you’re single today, I encourage you to begin praying for God to change your heart to one of submission. If you’re married and finding yourself having trouble in this area, pray the same. God wants to do big things in current and future marriages.

About Sundi Jo

Sundi Jo is a speaker, author, thought-provoking leader, and loser of 145 lbs.
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