Dear Little Sister,
I want to give you some advice on love.
First of all, let me tell you that things are not always as they seem. Fairy tales are something to admire, but they are not realistic. True relationships take some effort on both ends. In other words, one magical kiss doesn’t seal the deal. Love is timeless, and character is best seen up close.
No matter what people may tell you, remember that you have a kind heart. You are smart, you are beautiful and you are free. Remind yourself of these things when you feel lost. Your dreams are important, and the right person will come alongside you to cheer you on and lift you up. You won’t have to do all of the heavy lifting.
I know “sexy time” seems appealing, but don’t rush into a marriage for the sake of quenching your appetite. *ehem* At the end of the day, once you’ve had children and they are old and leaving the house, if you didn’t build a relationship on friendship, then it won’t last. Looks, charm and charisma really do fade as the years dwindle on. Without friendship and a man of character by your side, the days will pass by rather lonely, and imagine that your heart will be in want of substance.
Without follow-through, words expire and equate to meaningless letters strung together on a relationally devoid page. Love looks like something. If there is all talk and no walk, then I would begin to question whether you are falling for the words or the man. If just words, then you fall rather hard and crash even harder. If a man, then when you fall he will catch you and allow you the space you need to recover. Don’t get me wrong, this space will not be akin to the silent treatment of your younger years; a good man will still be present and communicate his support for you. No games will be played at the expense of your heart.
You, my darling, are worth the pursuit. The lucky man that successfully woos your heart should be shaking in his boots. You are a gem, and he will have to look to the Father to discern how to properly proceed.
While there is certainly no need for you to lower your standards, it is important to remember that you and your potential mate are still human. He won’t do everything perfectly, but a man of integrity will take responsibility for his blunders and will give you the grace to make mistakes. We are all humans growing more in love.
Unfortunately there is no magical cocoa butter to soothe the scars inflicted upon the heart, but I am under the firm belief that love always wins. Keep your hope in the right place, and your heart will be securely surrounded by love at all times. There is full coverage within the heart of the Father. When your hope is transferred to a different carrier, the coverage is at times faulty. This is to be expected. I don’t recommend switching carriers, but I do recommend living and loving from the place of absolute and full coverage. From this vantage point it will be easier to keep your love on, even when your heart is hurting.
Time is important, but it is not the answer. Love, after all, is a choice. I don’t believe that there is one special person out there for you. Nor do I believe that you can mess it all up. Relax. Enjoy the ride, and let people see your true colors. The right person will show up, and you won’t want them to ever leave, because you are more yourself now than you were when you were once alone. They will marvel at every color you choose to show, and their very presence will release a plethora of colors within you that you never knew existed.
To love and to be loved is a risk, but it is worth the taking and equally worth the giving.
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