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Secret To A Great Relationship Part 8: Bear Each Other’s Burdens

Secret to a great marriage
Photo courtesy of carynnoel.com
This is the eighth of an 8-part series from Jimmy Evans at MarriageToday from his book, Our Secret Paradise: Seven Steps for Building a Secure and Satisfying Marriage. Today’s post focuses on the eighth secret—Bearing each others burdens. Even before marriage, these keys will help you become the kind of person you want to date and the kind of person to look for in a potential mate.

Karen and I have learned that one of the keys to making a successful marriage is being there for each other. We’ve discovered that what is burdensome for one of us is not necessarily difficult for the other. Here’s a simple example.

Karen is five-foot-five and slender. At one time she had back problems of which the Lord subsequently healed her. I’ve found that she can easily be worn down by too rigorous a schedule. You see, she wakes up at 4:30 in the morning, has an hour and a half of quiet time, exercises for an hour and a half, and is the hardest worker you’ll ever see in your life. She’s very diligent. But she simply is not equipped for lifting and carrying things around the house. So I ease her burden by doing all of that kind of thing that I can.

I’m Mr. Tote-It, Fetch-It, Lift-It and Hoist-It at our house.

I go through the house picking things up. I vacuum, carry the groceries in and generally just look for ways to help her with my physical strength. These things are not a burden to me. And they ease what is burdensome for her.

In the same way, running errands around town, such as picking up the dry cleaning, and detail work such as getting the bills paid is burdensome for me. Bill paying is a joyless chore to me. As a result, I would have trouble finding the time to sit down and take care of it. But Karen loves paying the bills. She happily takes care of those kinds of things for me.

What is easy for me can be difficult for Karen, and vice versa. We bear each other’s burdens. Why? Because that’s what best friends do.

Be sure to read the rest of the Secret To A Great Relationship series.

About MarriageToday with Jimmy Evans

Since founding MarriageToday in 1994, Jimmy and Karen Evans have encouraged and coached countless couples in building rewarding marriages and healthy homes. With more than 50% of unions in America ending in divorce, the Evans are committed to sharing proven truths that can make the most troubled marriage good, and any good marriage great. They bring more than 25 years experience equipping and teaching couples to MarriageToday’s mission to restore the dream of marriage in America. Jimmy and Karen divide their time between Amarillo, Texas, where Jimmy serves as Head Elder of Trinity Fellowship, and Dallas, the location of MarriageToday’s headquarters. He and Karen have two grown children and four grandchildren.
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