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3 Tips For Developing Relationships Around Valentine’s Day

I have a lot of experience with what it’s like to be a Christian single gal living in the millennial age.

Some holidays can drive a single woman in her late 30s to scream at Valentine’s Day. Another pass at Christmas, another New Year and, oh-no-Heaven-forbid, another Valentine’s Day … still unmarried and single.

Should I hurry up and jump online to meet a special person, just to have a day of flowers and candy followed by a mad dash to the altar on Sunday, crying out to God, Okay, Lord, you were right. He wasn’t “the one,” and your ways are much better than mine.”

Have you ever battled the thoughts …

Wait, Lord — have I been trying to rush you to download me a mate? I know heaven’s timing and my timing are totally different. Please help me to understand Your plan.

Have my prayers of Give me a mate by a certain holiday been like a Google search in your eyes? Has my impatience with not having that prayer met been similar to my reaction to an image not being downloaded within 5 seconds of high-speed internet?

Could I be questioning the Maker of my heart and thinking that My Maker has a malware, all because my device has not yet received the request I submitted?

There must be something better to do than have a battle on Valentine’s Day! Here are 3 tips to help you develop the relationships you currently have … with God, family and friends.

1. Worship God 

We read in Psalm 25:13- 14 (The Every Day Life Bible),

He himself shall dwell at ease, and his offspring shall inherit the land. The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep,inner] meaning.

In my moments of impatience when certain holidays are approaching, the key to understanding God’s plan is to worship. I should worship God more in these moments of intense impatience. If I continue to worship Him, He will show me His plan for my life and reveal to me a much deeper meaning that perhaps my natural eyes can’t see.

My eyes are ever toward the Lord, for He will pluck my feet out of the net (Psalm 25:15 NKJV).

If I keep my eyes on God and continue to worship (while feeling caught in the net of loneliness), He will pluck me out of this situation that means to snare me.

No, in those lonely moments I will rise up and I will choose to worship you. I will choose to focus on knowing that My heavenly Father has the best plan set up for me.

2. Share Your Hope With Others

When family members pity you due to your age and single status, don’t take it as an insult. If they ask you why are you still single, look them straight in their eyes with the confidence of Christ and say, “Hey, God has the perfect design set up for my life!”

And if they hit you with “It’s been years, and you’re still single … Why is this God of yours taking so long with you?” Just let them know that God’s ways are not our ways, and that the Maker of this Universe has a plan so amazing that it will bless your socks off as well as theirs.


3. Make Plans For Valentine’s Day

If it is hard for you on Valentine’s Day, call out to the Holy Spirit. Ask Him to comfort you, and cry out to Him. Know that you are well-protected, and Your time will come.

Perhaps this would be a great day to take a day off of social media to give your spirit, mind and body self-care.

Go to a spa, gym or horseback riding. Plan a Valentine’s Day outing with other Christian single friends to help encourage each other. These are all things I have done to keep my spirit and soul upbeat during Valentine’s Day!


So this Valentine’s Day, if you find yourself feeling anxious and alone, or being hard on yourself, thinking I must be too ugly, too fat, too boring or too whatever to have someone in my life. Wrong! The devil is a liar!

I am here to tell you that you are too handsome, too beautiful, too smart, too precious and too well-loved by a God who will not let your heart be in just anyone’s hands. You have a Savior who is watching over you and refining both you and the one who He’s set aside for you for a perfect time and perfect season.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are a hidden gem who will be discovered in God’s perfect timing.

About Carlie Loi

Carlie is a energetic, fun, loving, optimistic world traveler who loves to travel the globe and learn about new cultures. She is a first-generation American who is very proud of her parents and her Haitian roots. By day Carlie is a registered nurse who enjoys helping people better their health outcomes nationwide in the insurance industry. By night she can be found on "The Go and Grow Show," a podcast she co-hosts. As a child she always had a strong love for Christ and a strong desire to work in the media. She wasn't certain how the Lord would merge the two. Being unmarried in her late 30s hasn't been a cake walk, but she has learned more than ever to trust the Most High God. She believes God will send her that special mate in His perfect timing. One thing she knows for sure is that God has never let her down.
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